If you missed the first post I did on The Woman Thing, and want to give it a read, click here.
Can I just tell you....can I JUST TELL YOU that this little bit of a topic has been wrestling around inside of me since writing two or three weeks ago. Sometimes in a fruitful way, sometimes in a 'gross make it go away' kind of way. Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones, right??!!
I still don't think I have all (or even many) answers for myself in terms of the woman thing. You know the thing. The one that quietly whispers or sometimes loudly blares "Lord, just don't let me miss it. Don't let me lose myself in this season. And yet, YES! DO let me lose myself in this season and be totally surrendered to it. Just please oh please help me stay in touch with where You are. Who You are. And what You want from me - today and in a forward moving way too." And the rumblings go on and on. At least for me, they do!
You know, I've only come to a few conclusions as I've wrestled. The biggest conclusion is that I really and truly believe that I'm supposed to be totally in love with this season and totally engaged with the ways that He wants to push my boundaries in other areas too. It's both. It's all of it. All at once. Which of course is never a perfect balance.
But what's in my heart for this post is to actually type out some of the things that I think He may want to encourage us in, specifically as women. Would you like to go with me on this little uncharted and not-guaranteed-to-be-accurate exercise? A little love letter from Him to me/you. Hey, what do we have to lose?
You, Daughter, you. You spend so much of your attention, energy and effort in approaching me. But I want you to hear me say that I AM THE PURSUER. Don't be afraid. Don't be hesitant to stop working so hard to pursue Me because I AM pursuing you. I am drawn to you. I want to be around you. I want to be laced into your being.
You are female. You are on purpose. All of my children are created in my image. ALL of you are made in my image. That means YES! Your femininity is initiated in Me. It was my idea. It is complex, intricate, beautiful, powerful, lovely, fierce, intelligent and designed. And it always has been. I love you in your femininity. And believe me, femininity is not a light word to me. It's not a pretty word. It's not a weak word. It's one half of what I make my children. There was a need for you and there is a need that only you were designed to meet.
You are not alone in your wrestle. I am right there, in it and through it with you. On the days you feel you can soar out of joy in the sweet moments and on the days when your soul stirs so deeply pricking you with fear that you somehow have or will 'miss it,' I am there. I am right there. I'm not bothered by the wrestle. I am even in the wrestle from time to time. I LOVE THE PROCESS with you! I love the now and I love what is coming. I am in it all. I am in your yesterday. I am in your today. I am in your tomorrow. I am present in all three. It's true. So when you lose yourself in today and the highs and lows, I am right there with you. And when you feel your heart stirring to take both small and daringly huge steps towards what else I am doing in your life, I am there too.
The truth is that I am always grounding you in the now AND I am pushing you forward at the same time. I am capable of that. When you try to do that on your own, with formulas, or follow another's path it will never bear fruit. It will only keep you spinning around in circles - neither content with your now nor taking real steps towards tomorrow. And when that happens, your today and your tomorrow are robbed from. I have fullness for you in your today. What is on your plate right now IS your calling. It's fully and totally and wholly where I am with you right now. And you can trust me to push you at the right time to break out of the boundaries when the time is right. But it won't work until the time is right. You don't want to miss it, right? Well you are in me and I am in you. And therefore, YOU WILL NOT MISS IT. I am the Vine. You are the branch. I am the potter. You are the clay. I am the Creator. You are the created. I am the Father. You are the child. Lean in and trust me. Trust me. Trust me.
Sometimes trusting me means following me on an uncharted path. Sometimes it means finding joy in the mundane. Sometimes it means going a path alone that no one else is going. Sometimes it means following the herd. There is no one path that is more righteous than another. The only righteousness is found in finding me. Follow me daughter!
You are my girl. Your path was never meant to be totally straight forward. I'm not typically found in straight lines but in winding/twisting/meandering paths. The only answer is to trust me. Trust me if I have something different for you than you have ever imagined. Trust me if there seems to be very little surprise in your day to day. Trust me.
I love you. I made you. I breathed life into you. I knew you before you were born. I am in your femininity. I am in your story. I take joy in your story. I take joy in the process we are walking out together. Great is my faithfulness. GREAT IS MY FAITHFULNESS!
Always. Before the beginning of time. Now in your every breath. Here I am and here I will always be.
Hmmmmm I'm breathing more deeply. He's in the complexity.
Sleep well my friend, my reader. And meet my writing partners tonight:
If you need a live worship feed, IHOP KC is great. This is Laura's set from Sunday, August 17. GOOD.
I needed it.
Abi
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